let it go

We're learning the popular song 'let it go' in choir which seems apt. I have more things I'm worrying about than I can pay attention to all at once. I've not been able to successfully share them as my usual way of dealing way of managing concerns is to talk them over and that just didn't work out today. I'm of the view that a problem shared is generally a problem halved. But I have learned that this depends on the problem, who you share it with, and how you go about it!! The best scenario is when the listener is someone who knows and loves you well so will have an idea as to why it's a struggle, they already know your buttons, your history, and their UPR comes about because they already know you're ace :-) and if your problem has nothing to do with them they can listen well and so give the space so you can work out what you want to do. I get this kind of listening every week in my co-counselling session as we have been doing this now for 14 years and it's transformational.
There's another scenario which is trickier for everyone I think, but still worth trying if handled gently. They still know and love you but this time they are involved in the situation. This can be mutually beneficial as it reduces everyone's isolation cos people are talking about the problem together instead of going off on their own with it. They will have a perspective that can bring insight, they will have their own suggestions for moving forward that you might not have thought of. But they also will have their own emotional response and sometimes it can result in a clamour of hurts where no-one gets well heard as each is too hurt themselves.
There is also a third scenario, this is what I offer on the helpline I volunteer on. This is where there is no involvement in the situation so no buttons pressed, it can be all about the caller. I don't know and love the caller but can have professional UPR and simply trust that they are of course doing their best and that whatever their struggle is matters to them and I can give them a space to work it through.

I'm very glad I have a walk with a friend booked tomorrow so should be able to regain my grip on all there is to be grateful for :-)

Meanwhile I need to let go of the fear of the unknown future, whatever is coming is well within my ability to cope with it. I've got better I think at not having expectations into the future anymore - who knows what life may be like next year, next month, even next week, so no point in expecting it to be a certain way.
I need to let go of the hurts and disappointments, what others do or say to me that upsets me is their issue, I am only responsible for my own comments and actions. This will be helped if I also let go of my expectations that others might behave like I would, when they don't!! Not everyone sees the best of others so readily and that still surprises me.

I've not seen the film from which the song is taken. It's a good job we altos don't get the line 'the cold never bothered me anyway!' cos it does bother me. Greatly. I've not been able to get warm enough for most of today.

This blog is a good way of helping to let things go. Hopefully now I can get some sleep.