there must be a reason for it all

Must there be a reason?
Are some things just un-reason-out-able, and unreasonable?

I have found the people that I've found to be most supportive are those who don't try and somehow 'make sense' of a person's 'untimely' death. This may simply be because it's not so great to have your feelings contradicted. So if I'm feeling like it is senseless, to have someone try and apply sense to it somehow seems to undermine how I'm feeling. So it might just be that it's a comfort that someone appears to understand, or agree, or is listening and reflecting back - these are all lovely things.

I do know that not everyone thinks/feels the same way as me. For some people it is perhaps important that we can apply reason, make sense, and maybe even justify everything somehow. I find it really hard to understand how people can think that death and suffering and injustice are all part of God's plan, that "God knows what he is doing" and has a purpose in it that we shouldn't question. This attitude I try and be compassionate about as it must have served people well, but it also leaves me cross.

I guess it can be hard to live without answers. It must be a comfort to some to believe there is a divine purpose that somehow God is in control. I don't think I'm a heretic for my beliefs in a God that is not in control but is weeping alongside us.

Yesterday was holocaust memorial day and that horrific time in our history can also not be reasoned away.

It would be fair enough to conclude from my blog that I'm struggling with big issues, but truth be told life continues apace. I'm still going to work, helping with homework, wondering what to cook for tea and scrabbling round for cash to pay the person who will hang out with the kids tonight whilst I sing. There are tons of other concerns in my life too, tho mainly I'm still happy that I'm living and loving as best I can. This is just a small space to sit and muse is all.

We're singing "shackles" at the gig tonight. Had better practice!