sexism and respect

Note to male readers: I don't know of everyone who reads this blog, but the men I do know who read this I have found to be lovely and respectful - this blog is about sexism and is NOT a personal comment on you, OK?

Last week I was reading about some research that looked into when a man would stop pestering a woman who didn't want them to be pestering her. It showed that men were more likely to stop the pestering if she said she already had a boyfriend/husband, than if she said she wasn't interested in them. The study concluded that these men were more afraid/respectful of the male partner than of what the woman herself actually wanted. Shocking.

I've been thinking about this, but being me, I've not just considered the sexism within this, but also wondered what I could change about my own behaviour. If I'm honest, I'm aware that my interest in people can vary - if they reveal something about themselves that I can relate to, or I want to know more about, I can find I'm suddenly more interested in them that I was before. I suspect this is true for most of us, tho the interest will differ. Some people may find themselves more interested if they discovered the person they were talking to had royal blood, I know my ears pick up when people share of themselves something that has shaped them into who they are today.

Human as I am, I think it's probably normal not to be uniformly interested in every single person all the time. I like that even when people annoy me, I am the sort of person who looks for the good, looks for commonground, searches out the connection. And I would hope that my respect for the other person doesn't vary, and certainly isn't dependent on who they are, if they are in a relationship etc.

I need to get to work before my phone runs out of charge, but I shall be checking with myself today as to where my interest in others varies, and if it impacts upon my respect.
xx