this is not an uplifting blog

Just like whenever you stop and think about it, the truth is we're all getting nearer to dying, there's no escaping the fact that at any given moment - even Boxing Day - Christmas is coming. I can feel the panic rising already. I don't feel I'm managing to keep up with life on a day to day basis without trying to plan ahead too.
I went shopping yesterday. I only go about twice a year so maybe it would have been better to have thought about present buying before rather than after, but never mind. I don't want to fall for the hype - I like Christmas being a December thing, so I really don't want to start thinking about it, let alone panic about it.
I was in town around 3 hours, buying essentials for the kids that I can't get in the place where I live. As it was lunchtime and I could feel my energy dipping, I am pleased to say I bought myself lunch. Definitely out of my comfort zone, to eat on my own, but I know it's good to push ourselves out of our comfort zone. In those 3 hours I spent half of what I earn in the whole week. I'm glad I don't go shopping more often. People sometimes ask how I manage my money so well and seriously, I think it's because I don't put myself in temptation's way. It's not just the seeing things that then has you think maybe I'd like one of those. It's all those yummy food smells that encourage us to consume more. It's seeing other people buying stuff and feeling like I ought to be part of that. I was glad to get get just what I'd planned and then scarper home again.

Sorry this is such a miserable blog. I shall not go shopping again for some time. And I think I probably need a bit more TLC before the kids come back, don't I! If my daughter were here she'd remind me to "do what I love" so I shall try that, tho if I can possibly sort out the pool that would be great or else there will be too many crappy things on tomorrow's to do list...