fuzzy

I've not really watched the news - the little I caught yesterday had me in tears. Part of me is shocked that there are people on facebook sharing the little stuff - I know the little stuff matters too, the photos of pets etc, the regular things that make up everyday life. I know not everyone will think it's a big deal - there are killings every day. Some of my friends are also outraged, distraught and calling for changes - to gun controls, to all the homphobic laws that somehow still exist. Some are posting rainbows, or flags or candles. I have decided not to change my profile pic - as I said after the Paris attack I feel I would want to change it every day to honour all the terrible things that are happening each day. I can see the hypocrisy there in the things I've said so far in this blog - sad that others are not commenting, yet aware that there are some things brought to our attention in the media and some that are not. This blog is a bit jumbled isn't it. And that's ok. We're not always coherent. I didn't sleep well last night and today my head has been fuzzy. I had a meeting and found myself for the second time in a week using the words "robust process"of my own volition.
I still can't face the awfulness of receiving a terrified text from my child just before they are killed.
And I'm also holding on to what I posted yesterday - that we musn't lose sight of the truth that there is less violence now than in previous times, it is the media that means we are more aware of it, and that fear perpetuates violence.

I spent a while in a room with a dog today whose slipper like fuzzy haired ears tempted me to stroke them. When I finally gave in to the temptation, they were more woolly jumper than the silky velvety loveliness of my own dog. See, I would rather talk pets than murder too.