Lots of gigging this weekend. I felt very privileged to be part of the one last night, as I got to listen to a fab accordion piece, and a Syrian play a keyboard in a way I've never heard before. Brilliant! As often happens after, I had people say how much it looked like I was enjoying singing. I do enjoy singing, so don't hold back letting that show on my face :-) Sometimes I worry if people think I look ridiculous. And then I remember that it doesn't matter if they think that, it would be their stuff. I don't need anyone's seal of approval for anything that I do :-) my hope is that in freely showing my joy others will know it's possible for them too - from the comments I get it does seem to help people increase their joy :-)
I wanted to wear a t shirt to the dentist yesterday proclaiming "usually I'm a strong courageous woman you know!" And of course again it doesn't matter what others in the waiting room, or the dentist think of me and my fear. And the truth is that I was courageous :-) and if I'd cried or not, it doesn't matter, strength is not about not having fears or keeping them hidden.
Ultimately I'm just perhaps a bit more expressive than others. I sing and smile my heart out when I'm in touch with the immense joy of a moment. and I cry my heart out when I'm sad or afraid. I can't imagine living any other way. I hope however you live suits you too :-)
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