It’s been a challenging month. I’m not going to give a
litany of woes, but I have experienced an even wider range of emotions than
usual – I don’t recall having felt jealousy before, and I didn’t know I had
such loving concern for the dog until he was attacked and hurt. An image that
has really helped has been of me curled up asleep in a slightly cupped palm,
lifted above all that has been threatening to overwhelm me. I’m pleased with
myself – I have mainly stayed focussed on my primary task of loving my children
and checking how they’ve been doing. And today things feel more hopeful. It
looks as if I will still have paid work in a couple of months, so will be able
to pay an increased mortgage (when I sort it).
Last night I reflected for the millionth time what a great
decision it was to join One Voice choir – my soul soared as we went through “the
storm is passing over” and “lovely day”. For the first time I rehearsed “love
lift us up where we belong” and so was reminded that this is what I choose – to
be lifted above the fear, by love, to where we all belong.
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