One Day

I selected and then sobbed through the film “One Day”. There was lots in it for me, but right now I’m taking it as a message to be conscious about the choices I make and make the most of the paths I'm on. To stay focussed on the why am I here and how do I want to be spending my life.

It’s good to notice what can pull me to maybe spend time and energy on things other than those that make most sense for me. I have a little reminder stuck to my computer screen that challenges me “Is this children time?” cos if I’m not careful, I can spend time on the internet that afterwards I think may have been more fruitfully spent with my children. It’s not to beat myself up with regrets (tho that’s easily done). And it’s not a selfish “I must have what I want.” Maybe it depends what we think we’re about, what dreams we’re following. For me who has decided I want to live a life of love, it’s about checking in with myself, am I taking opportunities to love as much as I can or have other things distracted me? Reflecting on what gets in the way of me parenting in the way I’d like; noticing when I’ve not again found time to do something that actually I’d really like to do (like phone some of my good friends). I guess most of us frequently question "is this a good use of my time/resources?" but it feels a bit different when looking at productivity and efficiency than when thinking about love.

Once more it’s a balance of seeking changes if I’m not living as I’d like, yet also trusting that there is rightness in the how-things-are. A friend recently used the word “mindfulness” and I have been continuing my attempts to live presently and contentedly. So I was detained a short while today and instead of feeling frustrated, went with it – this is where I am and there’s nothing I can do so I’ll choose to be fully in it and enjoy it, and find and share the love in where I am. All tips you have for doing this will be much appreciated :)