There is definitely joy to be found, tho it is tinged with sadness. Laying aside expectations is hard. It is good, if tricky, to focus on the 'what is' rather than the 'what could have been'. Mainly I am living my life in the way I'd like to live it - there has been joy in finding new ways to be. Yesterday I had a socially distanced walk in a beautiful place that I would never have walked in if it hadn't been for the pandemic rules meaning that's where I had to see my daughter. Each morning in December I've phoned the guy I'm telephone befriender for to open my advent calendar and describe to him what's behind the window. It's a calendar I've reused for several years now. There are definite advantages to losing my once prized memory. Each window offering is a surprise ( tho I'd remembered today's would be a nativity scene). Similarly I'm now able to re-watch films or programmes. In the past I'd be annoyed to watch something I'd already viewed - life was too short! - but now I can enjoy it over again as there's so much I simply cannot recall.
Tonight is set to be clear which is great as maybe tonight I'll glimpse the Christmas star (well the conjunction of Saturn and jupiter) whilst I stand out to sing silent night. When the usual can't happen we can make the unusual happen instead.
No comments:
Post a Comment