No need to fret

Last night I was part of a trio singing a verse that included the line "no need to fret, no need to fear" from a rather large stage at the opera house. I did fret, and my tummy still hasn't unknotted itself. Something would have to be different for me to want to do that again as that feeling of sickness is horrible and I'd much rather sing and enjoy it.

There's been some great bits this week, I got very excited by an article by Jane Leach about the pastoral theology of attention, all about noticing voices. This helped compensate for my disappointment on reading the highly anticipated love languages of God book. I was fooled by the promising rainbow splashed cover and subtitle about us reflecting divine love. Whilst the concept of the 5 love languages remains of interest to me, I couldn't bear the hideous theology of sickness, his abhorrent views around sexuality and his inability to use inclusive language, all somewhat surprising in a book about love.

I'm hoping to soon borrow a book about noticing impacts on our body. Right now with my twisted insides, it feels that info could be useful!

Beaumaris / Brexit

Last week I got to have a good look around Beaumaris castle, an excellent place for hide and seek with it's long corridors, myriad toilet cubby holes and symmetrical layout of towers and double walls. Ranked by UNESCO as a world heritage site, there was lots to enjoy, and my only regret (and I don't usually have regrets) is that I didn't video myself singing "swing low sweet chariot" in the chapel, as the acoustics were the best I've ever heard.

And yet it was never finished, this great example of a castle never got to be a castle, money ran out, and all those years of effort by so many labourers were wasted when the desires of the elite changed and finances were diverted to warring elsewhere.
Given that the news that day - as most days- was about Brexit, I couldn't help but draw similarities. I'm so cross that so much energy and money is going into what strikes me as a folly, when there is so much else we could be paying attention to, like addressing climate change, and tackling the growing use of food banks.
Despite never being completed, beaumaris still brings delight and learning today, so I guess wasn't totally in vain. I really hope that years down the line some good can come from this Brexit process, that it will have given a chance for people's voices and concerns over how we fit into Europe, to have been heard. The endless debating infuriates me and I suspect we will never really reach an end as whatever the outcome, people's perspectives on it will still need to be heard. As always, I want to stay focussed on where I can make a difference, and my own eternal question is more around "what matters?" Which for me is only how we keep on loving, whatever the situation...

Bruise

I am thoroughly enjoying my job and yesterday ran an event and noticed I felt so at ease. It is using a lot of my gifts and I really like how every day is so different. It wasn't all delightful tho. The kitchen entrance had an open child gate on it, and for some reason, every single time I entered the kitchen, I bumped my thigh on the frame. By the afternoon I was developing a bruise on the bruise and it was rather tender. I was really surprised that I kept not learning, but repeating my mistake despite the pain. One colleague said that next time she'd have to remove the frame for me. I'm not sure how easy that would be but it got me thinking. How many times do we make the same error before we start to do something differently? And might it sometimes be worth removing the source of pain if we really are struggling to adjust?
I'm a big believer in our ability to develop, to learn from our failings. But it's good to be open to other options. Maybe next time I could take a little cushion or something, to tape over the offending sticky out bit?
Today I wish you ease for the things that repeatedly bruise you.